Alice: ‘Stop! I see you, Theodore. Put that apple back!’

Theo: ‘But I want it!’

Alice: ‘I think you want it with your eyes, Bubba. But you don’t like the taste of them, remember?’

Theo: ‘I do like them! I want to eat it!’

Alice: ‘I know it’s beautiful, darling. But you are going to take one bite out of that thing and then tell me it’s yucky.’

Theo: ‘I’M NOT!’

This goes on for some time. I have already given Partially-Eaten-Apple Shortcakes to all and sundry. Maybe I’ll stew this lot?

Mabel: ‘Stop it you guys! Look! I’m jumping on my bum!’

Ever the peacemaker, however unorthodox.

Theo turns to me.

Theo: ‘…I don’t like it…’

Apple…pies?